I Am Not A Mom

  No Mother’s Day brunch,
or handmade gift shall I receive.
I long for the love of a child,
but I can only grieve.
I am not a mom.
Friends old and new,
once single like me.
Married with families,
content to let me be “aunty.”
But I am not a mom.
Some may choose to not be one,
but the choice was ripped from my hands.
I wanted but can never have,
the one thing that was part of my plans.
I will still never be a mom.
Every year in May,
I weep for the loss.
It is the overwhelming sadness,
that is my cross.
I cannot be a mom.
Am I jealous,
you could say yes.
But I squelch my envy
because it just makes me stress.
I wish I was a mom.
I hear others say
but you are one really.
Just a different kind,
perhaps more ideally.
I could be a mom.
But I am still sad,
and will never hide it.
A part of me is missing
more than I care to admit.
No…I am not a mom.

In full disclosure, this pain never goes away.
 Every year, no matter how hard I try to ignore it, the day still arrives. 
I am filled with nothing but sadness and grief.
I am not a mom, and no matter how much I long for it, will never be a mom.
I will never take anything away from all the other moms out there,
but I won’t ever apologize for the way I feel.  

For those of you like me, I understand…

Like anything you see here? Then contact me, Susan Dusterhoft at [email protected]. I am always looking for more books/products to review. I can also provide assistance with blog writing!

One thought on “I Am Not A Mom

  1. So sorry to hear your pain and frustration through this but thanks for sharing. Please know that sometimes being a mom is not about having your own kid but celebrating that young kids look up to you. Spoil yourself today and love each day to its fullest.

    Sarah Butland

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